Speculations and Spectacles

bitching about bitches … and other musings

The Bachelor Episode 6: Ice Castles, More Canoes, Hypothermia, and Falling in Love in a Teepee

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TWO EPISODES IN ONE WEEK, AREN’T WE ALL SO LUCKY.

  • OH THEY IN CANADIA. Crossin’ tha border!
  • “There’s a woman here tonight I don’t see a forever with” Everyone hopes it’s Tierra, I betcha $1,000 it’s not!
  • MOUNTAINS, LAKES, WATERFALLS, BEARS, SNOW! Why is your shirt on, Sean?
  • Sean don’t like drama, no drama for your mama!
  • The water is fake, it’s so blue! Maybe its CG

bluewater

  • DATE CARD! Catherine gets a 1 on 1, she’s adorable.
  • Czech owt dat SNOW BRO!
  • GIANT SNOW BUS & SEAN IS DRIVING IT! – Remember when he couldn’t start the jeep?
  • Oh she sits behind him? HAHA

catherinesitsbehind

  • “Thank you for traveling with Sean’s Giant Snow Bus!”
  • His hair is snow, HAHAHAHAHA! It looks too cold to have fun!

frozensean

  • “Catherine has passed the blizzard test.” CUTE

snowplaycatherine

  • Commercial
  • “I want everything with him” yeah, okay. All da gurlz say this.
  • ICE CASTLE! WITH A FIRE IN IT?!

icecastle

  • “It just clicks with you” STOP USING THE SAME LINE ON ALL THE GIRLS, SEAN!
  • Daniella didn’t get the 1 on 1 date, but neither did Tierra
  • “I want Sean to know the reason I am the way I am” -Catherine… Oh, why you’re so sweet and cute?
  • OMG 12 year old traumatic story. YIKES. I’m surprised she didn’t turn out more like Tierra!
  • Traumatic sob stories get roses.

snowcastlekiss

  • I want their blanket.
  • “Catherine has melted my heart” … but not the ice castle HEH HEH! bad jokes by Paulina
  • Commercial
  • GROUP DATE!
  • AshLee runs to be the first to hug. First grade mentality I WANNA BE FIRST.
  • CANOES ROUND 2
  • AHHHH Lesley claims Sean’s canoe, THAT WAS FAST. She probably doesn’t want to row.
  • HAHAHA She just said my idea of letting “the man” row!
  • Selma’s cranky… her laugh. NOOOOO!

selmalaugh

  • Sean and Lesley make it to land first, BIG SURPRISE!

canoelesleywin

  • Let’s embrace Canada, by jumping into the freezing water.
  • AIGHT so there is the professionals saying “get out of the water as quickly as possible”, I have a feeling someone won’t listen.
  • Selma don’t want to swim in NO freezing water! & Tierra looks cranky, we know what’s gonna happen
  • Lesley jokes about hypothermia… you have no idea what’s coming girl!

lesleyHypothermia

  • Commercial
  • AshLee doesn’t want to do this either.
  • “I think I’m from Baghdad” – Selma
  • OKAY, this date is to distinguish the high maintenance girls from the low maintenance girls. So far Selma, Tierra, and AshLee are high maintenance. But Selma is the only one sitting out.

hellnoselma

  • The taking of the shoes off & then SHIRTLESS SEAN!

SHIRTLESSSEAN

  • Where is Tierra going on her own? K she got in and out on time…?

inthewater

  • HAHA everyone is so excited! SMILES ALL AROUND!
  • “Tierra can’t breathe” um where is her towel and her shoes? WTF!
  • Aw Daniella is helping warm Tierra up! Even though she’s a bitch. JK I would obvs do the same.
  • Commercial
  • Is it even possible to get hypothermia that soon?
  • Tierra is still so cold! 😥 WAH, cry me a river, bitch

Tierrablefreezing

  • Is Tierra the biggest wuss ever or is this really real?
  • “This guy better marry me! I’m just kidding” … “No, you’re not” UM AWKWARD. RU4REAL?!
  • Commercial
  • 7 on 1 date changes to 6 on 1 date (Thanks to Tierra)
  • BOW CHICKA WOW WOW Lesley reminds us she got to hold Sean’s hand when they jumped in the water.

lesleyholdingseanshand

  • She’s so cute. She loves love! AW!
  • “I appreciate you so much!” -Sean… what does that mean? That sounds cryptic.
  • Lesley is the Arie of this season. They makeout a lot, but will she win? Will she get stuck in second place?
  • Sarah shares family stories and photos! … Oh she gave him the photos? That is a little weird.
  • Desiree call me Des gets a second 1 on 1! Over Tierra and Daniella. Hm…
  • Tierra gets ready to go out to the date a little late, fashionably late?
  • Oh no the girls are making fun of her! When she walks in?! Whoa. Planned much?
  • Her hands are warm because her body is so cold?! Uh no.
  • Wedding Dress Lindsay steals Sean away from Tierra to make out.
  • BUT LESLEY gets the rose! HOLLA!
  • Tierra (Eyebrows McGee) is pissed. “I think I deserve it and I don’t think its fair” LIFE AIN’T FAIR YOU STUPID BITCH!
  • For once a sob story doesn’t get a rose, you’re getting a little better Sean.
  • Commercial
  • OH MY GOSH, THE FAMILY PHOTOS FREAKED SEAN OUT. HOW SAD! Sarah is going home.
  • “It’s just not meant to be” :/ :/ :/ :/
  • Gosh, so many break ups on this show. (25 break-ups to be exact)
  • BRING ON THE WATERWORKS.
  • “I don’t know what happened, I don’t know if it’s me” Well yeah, its you.
  • She’s really venting it out on this going home segment. WOW.
  • Bye Sarah!
  • And then there were 16 arms left competing… (another bad joke by yours truly)
  • Commercial
  • Des’s 1 on 1 date! “Don’t be scared to FALL in love”
  • THE WHITE FLOWERS, THOSE WERE NICE.
  • Gonna repel down the mountain to a picnic! FUN! Why do all the girls get so freaked out by these “dates”/challenges.

repeldes

  • “It would be a lot harder if Sean wasn’t here right now” … you wouldn’t be doing this if Sean weren’t there!
  • “I don’t want you to give up on us” – Sean … yeah, because that’s his job to decide if HE wants to give up or not.
  • DID ANYONE ELSE SEE THE ELKS TONGUE AT THE END?! HAHA.
  • Commercial
  • RACCOON SPOTTING!
  • LOOK AT SEAN’S SWEATER! LAWL

seanssweater

  • OH its so he matches the Teepee, or is it Tipi?
  • Fire cracking? Sketchy.
  • Des grew up poor! & lived in a tent for 4 months growing up.
  • “I want a house full of love” she said with hearts in her eyes.
  • OH NO the dreaded-overused: “I want to be with my best friend”
  • LOL teepee shadow kissing.

teepeeshadow copy

  • “I opened up about living some of my life in a tent and here I am falling in love in a teepee” HAHAHA
  • Commercial
  • “You’re gonna WIFE that?!” -Selma on Tierra. HAHA Selma has great quotes!
  • I want to know what everyone is drinking each rose ceremony!
  • Selma kissed Sean?! Say goodbye to your family!
  • Wedding Dress Lindsay promises not to kiss-away her time with Sean, BRAVE MOVE.
  • “I sleep naked” Wedding Dress Lindsay is crazy
  • OH SHE COULDN’T KEEP HER NO-KISSING PROMISE.

nokisslindsay

  • AshLee does all these weird metaphorical things each week! Blind folding to show her vulnerability/her trust.
  • I feel like she may be taking the Sarah approach, soon she will do something that will make Sean uncomfortable & she’ll be gone.
  • Commercial
  • Two BITCHEZ going home tonight?
  • CANDLES IN THE FIREPLACE —> CLEVER
  • Could Tierra finally be going home??
  • OKAY SO SELMA, TIERRA, DANIELLA AND ONLY ONE ROSE LEFT
  • Tierra got the rose! HOLY MOLY!
  • Selma is regretting that kiss.
  • It would really suck to be beaten out by Tierra!
  • 6 BITCHES LEFT!
  • Heading to the Virgin Islands… because Sean is a born again virgin. HAHAHA!

virginsean

  • Previews: AshLee says “I love you” & then is a tattle-tale… uh oh!

Moral of why we all watch The Bachelor… or maybe why Tierra is on the show:

aprilparksandrec

See you next week!

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2 thoughts on “The Bachelor Episode 6: Ice Castles, More Canoes, Hypothermia, and Falling in Love in a Teepee

  1. Water is not fake. I live in Alberta, go to Lake Louise every year and the bachelor camera did justice. The water is just as blue as they show it. And it’s not even the prettiest lake in Alberta. Check out Bow summit and the lake.

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